paid angela a visit today and saw the o-biang neighbour's house..can understand why the folks living there see it as an eye-sore cuz it really does stick out in a row of perfect, one base colour homes but if the location of the house was changed then i figure it wouldnt really look too bad..to his his own remember.

the first thing i did when i came home on sat was to run onto my bed, hug my pillow and start crying. i dont really know why but the tears just kept flowing. i guess i was looking back at all the good times i had spent in softball, all the things that i would miss, all the laughter and the joy, the off-key (at least for me) singing, the utter madness and pure chaos that always reigned when we were around. was therapeutic i figure cuz i finally let it all out. let all the tears that i was pretending never existed. let out all the pain that i told myself wasnt there. think i sat on my bed for an hour just sobbing. it was never going to be easy, that i knew but at least i stopped pretending that i didnt care. im definitely gonna miss it all. Looking back i guess i have no regrets what-so-ever about it. im glad it was a such a big part of my life. it taught me alot about my limits, my goals and gave me a focus that i never knew possible. but sometimes its better to leave those memories as they are: pure , unscathed and untouched by cold hands. im glad i spent 4 yers there and made some of the best memories of my life there but im also glad that im finally letting it all go; no regrets, no apologies, just memories that ill keep with me through the next load of hundles life's gonna throw my way

not in the mood to go on anymore so ill stop here