© 2006 BLACK-SOLACE {R.}
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V27 :kiss away the young thrills

designer
trent!
angela
xueting
karwei!
deb and bel
mish
hannah and co
clique
shihui
michelle

heh thanks k.haw!

peace out. 1:03 AM

im at starbucks typing this lol i have wireless! whoohoo! haha shoot me! im damn tired. the brain has decided to snooze for a bit. grr.

peace out. 5:46 PM

edit: can you imagine Christmas is over?! fast yea and to think it feels like only yesterday that i was preparing for the chiang mai trip, being an ogl, mentally preparing to become j2 and basically partying my ass off. well time flies doesn't it. so anyway today was fun. my cousin turned 21 and yes we had another one of our traditional mega bh.ullar family dinners.. except it was way more posh at this restaurant and pretty much had everything u need for a fabu party like good food, super loud music, dancing and yes booze. lol- end edit

good ol' be.nji always makes my day! he just sent us a Christmas greeting..how sweet of him.. i like. its been a crazy fun week. no i still haven't found a job. but wait was i ever even looking? heh but i promise to go hunting on the 2nd of jan. theres just so much i have to finish right now like so many apps in the midst of catching up with people.. i plan to trot to starbucks on the 26th and just do apps the whole day heh wish me luck!.

so anyway deb's house Christmas party was on sunday and it was a blast. deb and bel can win any eating contest hands down. i kid you not. the amount we ate was amazing and after i was nearly bursting and dying they still had place for more!! whoo! who ever knew that much food could fit in their petite stomachs.. but it certainly felt like heaven on earth..it started with aunty's chilli concarni (err spelling?) which conveniently had "chicken" for me. heh then it was the turkey! with stuffing and beard papa and the log cake we ate like a quarter of it..i kid u not..the pasta the other brownie cake..the muffins!..omg i could rattle on! and apart from absolutely mouth watering food..the last Christmas guy was there! haha i may have missed it last year but hell i wasn't going to two years in a row yea and boy he didn't disappoint though i think Deb's church friends, joe and v.incent may have stolen the show. and its amazing how sporting everyone was. its such a perfect feeling. her dad was right..Christmas is all about spending time with the people you love and cherish! i heart you deb and bel and stupid roy you missed good food AGAIN! gasp you should know better.

then monday was spent with tar.a and ch.u first shopping for tar.a's family's Christmas gifts and then having dinner. yay i missed chu so it was nice meeting up again! and talking and yes im jealous super jealous....makes me feel so much like a...GIRL!! heh who knew.. and and you know what he said i looked pretty that day even though i didn't dress up at all! and i was wearing hideous slippers!heh yes my day is so easily made!

lunch with the girlies this friday! whoohoo i cant wait im going to wear a dress and sat with the softballers! yay count me in where ever there's food. goodness at this rate im gonna be super fat..oh well i figure ill start exercising again next year. im running the 10km run next year! yes at first me the ambitious one wanted to try half marathon until everyone said that i'll die so yea 10 k it is. yup expect it to be slow but who cares 10k is 10k yes?


i think these hols have been pretty happy..although the mother is breathing down my neck way too often about the whole job issue and driving. but you cant blame me i still have many apps to do yea! haiz i guess it'd all be worth it in the end. yea im sort of gonna go off now though ill like to add..

"I don't want her to be in love with me" Jack muttered. "I'm going to tell her to stop."
"You can tell her but that doesn't mean its gonna to change anything."
Jack punched at the dough. "Why not?"
"Because its her heart," she said, "and she gets to choose where it goes."

peace out. 12:02 AM

peace out. 11:12 PM

i think im horrid at dealing with grief/sadness/disappointment.. you get the gist..basically all those emotions that render you to feel down..like today..instead of crying or ranting or screaming and just letting it all out..i instead went straight back to bed..cuddled up in my comforter and pretended everything was fine. like nothing had happened. then i woke up..went for the golden compass with t.ara and went to mango sale after for retail therapy where i bought a top and helped ta.ra get jeans. imagine that not a single tear shed for a broken dream. after which i went for coffee with d. a typical day. who would have thought i had a broken heart as well.

i dont know. perhaps im simply bad at expressing those emotions..its as if theres an impenetrable wall when it comes to dealing with sadness..like i always have to be the sunshine girl or something..i was re-reading one of ro.y's notes the other day while clearing up the cupboard and it was a letter she wrote after the whole softball team thing.. and i quote "i know you take it like a man" and "it seems as if you are fine when you really are not"..and other things that made me wonder perhaps i am sort of a rock when it comes to these things arent i? ill laugh with you, hug you when you're down tell you things will be fine..be there for you but probably wont let you be there for me. unless you are really really close. fine come back roy i need you here..ah well.

but really really im ok. or maybe it hasnt sunk in yet and maybe i just need to cry.. though right now i cant seem to remember how to.silly isnt it. i cant remember how to cry?! and well d planned to take me out drinking tonight to deal with it since he believes that im a inner tormented soul that needs rescuing..his words not mine.. he thinks i hide a lot behind that smile..imagine that?! coming from someone im not even very close to..if he can see it i wonder how many other people can or maybe they just think i never get sad..maybe you think? so anyway m found out and decided we couldnt go until he gets back since he has no faith in our tolerance levels.. bah come back soon too then mat.t! and he refuses to tell us the day he's returning so well done me and d went for coffee instead then just now. yes loser tell me about it.

well onto other stuff then..i got a nice top from mango i like and the mother might be getting me jeans too! yes i love her! and tar.a got the Penelope cruz collection one..uber hot..i want one too! must go hunt it down tomorrow yes. and well the golden compass was well..actually i liked it a lot and cant imagine why anyone wouldnt! except the ending la..quite jack..but since i like all movies u shouldnt ever take my word for it.

so thats it i guess. if you've read this far im mighty proud of u and if you could, teach me how to cry wont you. teach me how to be sad and not feel silly and while you're at it teach me how to smile.. the real kind not one that hides shadows behind it.
it will be much appreciated.

peace out. 10:07 PM

spotted: eh sorry dunno what to say was just trying to use a gossip girl line.lol oh i dont really know where to load my pics cuz me the genius used my 8.1 mega pixels camera..yes smart move. the files is so imba big i want to slap myself. grr.
tomorrow's council farewell. im crashing(a technicality you wouldnt understand unless you're a councillor) me and ka.rwei actually..we arent on the guest list you see.. hmm odd yea? lol and hopefully before that i get to catch the golden compass.
yup so thats tomorrow's plan.
anyway here's a random thought.. what do you call the best friend of your best friend. like me ma.tt and de.e. m's my bestie(somedays lest he gets all ego about it) and d's he's other bestie. so that makes me and d what? not really acquaintances yea but friends? not quite there either. im just wondering cuz i was talking to m a while ago and he asked me if ive seen d lately and well i havent. it used to be us three doing rubbish together but ever since m left, me and d just stopped hanging out. cuz well m was the common friend you know. so anyway im having lunch with him either tom or sat. wish me luck.
the other best friend of your best friend. hmm...you know maybe ill use that as a conversation starter with d he'll love it lol. and maybe ill intro some of my closest friends to him too. the other best friend meets the other best friend.
oh shit im freaking talking crap now. sorry cya!
hopefully ill get my pics soon too?

edit: and yes ong k.arwei i have given you evidence of possibly the most embarrassing/thick skin and yet one of the most feel good moments of my life. if you ever use this against me or if anyone sees it ill slap you silly understand!

peace out. 1:45 AM

you know i find it horridly weird to type titles since i never had to do them before but oh well im digressing i shall complain about that some other time.


so since the euphoria of grad night has simmered a little i figured ill sit my bum down and blog about it..just for memory's sake. the day definitely didnt start as happily as i would have liked. first there was the whole hair issue.. you see after the initial jubilation at seeing my hair finally done i was like yay but after 5 mins i completely hated it and wanted the lady to change it but it was six by then so yea no go.


then i had to cab down to the vic.toria hotel and the uncle went the wrong way! and then even better i couldn't open the hotel room door. goodness i was super annoyed by then. and to top it off i had to walk back to swiss after that since guess what there was no cab for me to take..yes it certainly wasnt that far but dude you try walking in heels with the freaking wind in your face..not very nice may i add.


but it got much better after that, thankfully. even though i was rather late it didnt really matter since no one was really eating anyway. and it was quite funny sitting with mi.sh's classmates but since i knew so many of them it wasnt that odd. and i did have a lot of fun when i was at the table which actually wasnt a lot since i was walking around camwhoring like crazy. i think out of all the courses i actually only ate one...the dessert! lol oh well it was worth it.


and and and angel.a did something super nice for me! although i wanted to slap her when she did it cuz she totally sold me out and i was highly embarrassed.. thank goodness sy was there.. in the end it was all good! thank you chan! heh. and after that i was super duper happy!


went to post prom after though i didnt expect too..in the end lin.khaw.chu.mish.koong all popped by there and it turned out to be rather fun. lol we drank and actually danced! lol now now dont gasp ok! i think my alcohol tolerance is quite high i must say..not too bad la.. but after a while you sort of see the drunk ones emerging and although it was endearing at first it was a tad worrisome too. and bel! tsk tsk lol..


went back to the hotel after gossiped a little and then i fell asleep lol.. we had this mega plan to go eat breakfast at around six at macs since it was already 5 plus by then but my falling asleep screwed that up. oh well


so i guess that was prom. it turned out way better than i expected since my expectations were already very low and well THAT(heh) just made it all the better.


edit: and you know what kar.wei agrees with me about THAT! we have good taste ok! heh

peace out. 8:56 PM

just finished watching nine episodes of gossip girl back to back. its super chick-flicky but i like!and im fairly no actually like 99.9 percent sure that dan is based on Seth in the OC. the resemblance is uncanny..well not really in terms of looks but more the mannerisms like they talk way too much, witty sorta completely out of their element..like a rachel-seth thing except its no longer second fiddle but the now the main story..hmm i like..the geek gets the hot girl! lol nate's the pretty boy and the whole b-n thing is actually quite sweet..i mean honestly can you possibly imagine dating a guy from kindergarten. earth to the martians yea. and slap me for this but i like chuck too. he's the typical sleazy rich guy that may not be all that bad.
ah! its like a feel good movie..though uber long but oh well and oh by the way kristen bell's voiceover is darn good.

though its a tad weird to imagine high school (jc for us) being anything like that. high society, gossip blog about the people in your own neighbourhood where no one is spared is pretty amazing. ah the joy of new york! upper east side anyone. tomorrow is my ugly betty marathon, after i clean up and write a few essays that is.

darn i need to start exercising again. whoops its a little random. must be the hour. alright then off to bed.
goodnite. or more appropriately good morning sunshines!! ok kick me now.

peace out. 4:27 AM

i love you an.gela chan! heh!

peace out. 4:04 PM

i am annoyed! they closed down the website i swear by to get my movies/shows bah! and now i cant find all my shows anymore. crap why did they have to close it down after my a's! humph. i want ice cream.

peace out. 9:40 PM