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Thursday, May 14, 2009

bleaugh.. i know i shouldnt be doing this now but the mother got semi pissed at me today... everyday i come home and say "not very good, think might fail" today not different
hmm and after tom she wants me to talk to dad about europe.. if i still really want to go given that i might hit subs and what happens if i do...

haiz i know i have one more tom but that one im going to spam after this..

im just completely drained.. poppoing pillls to survive.. i never had to resort to this before..

if i do actually make it through this without subs i dont think ill play next year much.. i like c's 5 month break idea but i know its not for me already.. i think it'd be like a whole lifestyle change..

so back to the papers.. one shouldnt hit subs...2 is really 50-50.. i thought the second part was much much better than the mcqs but its really very hard to call.... i need a 53 which is a 106... i honestly dont know if i can get it done or not.....
then todays was bloody shitass... i know everyone said it was easy and doable but i wanted to die.. not because it was hard but because i didnt know all the fking things that came out.. like i didnt study those yesterday so it was like trying to dig out from my brain.... i pray pray pray that i pass my mcqs then shouldnt be a problem but can i fking pass my mcq?

its like so much of me is banking on just hope...
theres a tiny voice in my head that says i think you will be ok but thats also the voice that lies to myself to make me feel better so i dont know anymore.

give me hope.

edit: i think you just did
(because my dad is the coolest =) )

peace out. 6:28 PM