when snowflakes fall;
Sunday, August 02, 2009
there's a huge part of me that still doesn't understand all of it; or any of it for that matter. how i could have been so wrong. but then there's this other part that thinks perhaps i knew all along but i chose to pretend that the signs weren't there and that i chose to believe things that actually meant little.
either way i doubt i will ever find out given that talking is out of the question now. so i figure that perhaps the point is that i shouldn't understand it all. maybe
i'm simply meant to learn from this, take it in my stride and move on.
there's no doubt that
i'm a tad angry, but more than that
i'm simply disappointed that what i thought, expected never was. but
life's like that isn't it. a road bump here and there that's meant to teach me a lesson or two. and maybe its for the better. no not maybe. it definitely for the better and someday ill realise that.
for now though i still think about it; try to look back see what went wrong or if it even did.. and with time that will go away too.
so enough about that. because the days now have been calmer, busier and i haven't had much time to react yet which is good i think. and nearly everyday in the past two weeks i have made awesome new friends for which i thank god.
and i think ill go for playhouse auditions this year. i figure it would be nice to do something different. and the worse that could come out of it would be me not getting in which seriously isn't that big a deal. so yea. and it'd keep me busy as well which
i'm afraid is all i want right now. because the less time i have to think about it; the better.
and actually
i'm pretty certain most of u know what
i'm talking about. which surprisingly makes me feel nothing. id rather you know than have me pretend that
i'm happy about it.
peace out. 12:44 AM